NBD and Emirates Bank...nice try

You know, looking back, I see I bitch a lot about government institutions. It is not a conscious effort, it just happens. It is usually these institutions that cause us residents a great deal of stress. It drives me nuts, but that is the way it is. The point of this Blog is to "tell it like it is" to potential residents and expats coming here and help them avoid the pitfalls that come with moving here.

I will say for the record, if I can score a decent gig here in the coming weeks, I will be happy to stay here, conform and put up with all the bullshit associated with living in Dubai. I made a 3 year minimum commitment when arriving and I am happy to see it through, but these bastards need to come to the party as well.

It is no secret that expats from every corner of the globe have been taking off and leaving their debts behind. There is little recourse, as when your visa is canceled, you gotta go. If faced with being trapped here and potentially going to the clink or taking off and leaving behind your debt, I would chose the former.

Let's be realistic for a second. Dubai is quite the rumour mill. There is a new BS email circulated or a new BS "law" you hear about every day. It is viral here. Back to reality. Many people have lost their jobs and had visas canceled. That sucks. These same people need to leave the country within 30 days. They own cars, houses, have credit cards, etc. The rumour du jour is that you can't leave the country if you lose your job. You "hear" that you will be turned around at the airport. This is complete and utter crap. Garbage. Drek. Get real.

Just to clarify, I have left and returned since losing my gig, and I also know several other people that have. We all have loans of some sort and have had no issue. I wish people would use their heads and think about it. YES, if you bounce checks and have legal issues, you are in shit....but if you are paying your bills, have a positive bank balance and carry on, you're fine.

Question: "Can a foreign Government detain you for losing your job?" I think not. People own cars and houses here that are nowhere near paid off. Do you think if you lose your job, you are now a prisoner? How the hell can the bank possibly keep you from leaving if you are paying your bills on time and are leaving the country. They can't or I think you would see several thousand "guests of Mo." Also, jailed people have a tough time paying their bill, me thinks!.

Over the past (almost) 2 years I have banked with Emirates Bank, EBI, or NBD, not sure who they are this week. I got a call a few weeks ago from someone there (in addition to the weekly "would you like a retarded-interest-loan" call) They/she was wondering if I had a new salary certificate to deposit with them as there is not one on file. I informed her that I do not have a job, but my loan is being paid and is guaranteed, so what is the problem. She said "no problem, but perhaps I would like to pay off my loan". I told her no, that I was fine with status quo, and why would she ask me such a question. Her reply: "Just checking dear, have a nice day". What are they checking? That I am still here?

Last week there was a good one. For the record, I keep my money in my mattress, not in the bank. Banks go tits-up these days and I don't trust the bastards. I made a deposit on a Tuesday to cover my monthly expenses, and of course it did not get credited in time (a day late, even after spending 2.5 hours at the bank). I got the following text from some she-twit at "Emarits Bank":


I texted the following back to said she twit:


She called back, I tuned her in and have never heard back.

My take on it is that they are giving these banktards some sort of incentive to get expats to pay up (or see if they are even still here). That is all well and good, but stupid methods like this? Are you serious? Get lost you twits. Banks are not the ultimate authority here or in any other country. I assure you, both local readers and son-to-be-expats....the banks can blow it out their ass. Keep the bills paid, you will see no problem. Don't let them try you on, and there is nothing illegal about calling them on it. Jackoffs.

BTW.I am happy to supply this bank employee's number to anyone interested for verification.